Managing You...

bev • August 14, 2023

Manage your thoughts and emotions

What do we mean when we say the inside out paradigm? - Very simply we are saying, our thoughts create our experience of reality.  We are not just hearing our conscious thoughts as they only make up 11%, the biggest driver is our subconscious thinking which is 89%. 

The two work in very different ways.  The conscious is logical and uses words that we relate to, the sub conscious is driven by emotion and offers up feelings that generate thoughts. 

This influences your experience of reality.  If you have a strong belief that you are going to be bad at running the subconscious will generate a feeling around being bad at running.  We are interpreting internally what is going on externally but not referencing any experience of reality. 

An example I am scared of snakes yet I have never encountered a snake, the snake is not sending me the fear, my feelings from my subconscious are driving my fear and anxiety.  If you go to the cinema and watch a horror movie the walk home is worse than the walk there.  Your feelings around the film have now altered the walk home which in reality is very safe as it is the same walk.

We need to stop thinking we can manage emotions, and understand that a new feeling drives a new thought.  Babies never sustain any emotion for too long, they feel happy they are happy, they are sad and they feel sad, babies do not let the subconscious over process, partly as their brains are still developing. 

Try to stop controlling emotion, accept it and grow with it.  Have the experience with the emotion, you can handle it, and don't avoid it.

I am not suggesting we do things that scare us for the sake of it.  However don't let fear grip you, take risks and feel the emotion associated, and accept it but don't let it stop you from having the experience.  Emotions are temporary and will pass, as with the baby experiencing numerous amounts in one hour. 

Once you have achieved whatever it was that took you out of your comfort zone, learn from the thinking and emotion around it.  Daily journalling is a good reference of how you experience emotions.



By bev March 9, 2026
Hard Conversations
By bev March 3, 2026
Processes & systems lead to results
By bev March 3, 2026
Big thinking, Direction, Identity and Growth
By bev February 26, 2026
Strong ground is the ability to stay emotionally steady, honest, and courageous—even when things feel uncertain or uncomfortable...
By bev February 16, 2026
Coaching and AI—a partnership you didn’t know you needed.
By bev February 11, 2026
How to stop procrastinating?
By bev February 3, 2026
Practical tips:-
By bev January 26, 2026
No. 1 The Opening Ceremony & The Closing Ceremony
By bev January 15, 2026
"Ask not Tell"
By bev January 5, 2026
Reset, refocus & restart
By bev December 4, 2025
Getting the transition right...
By bev November 24, 2025
"Leadership is plumbing and poetry" James March
More Posts