Human connection holds the key to happiness…
A Harvard Study of Adult Development began in 1938 with 724 participants and consequently 1.300 interviews with the descendants. The result has been the world’s longest study of what makes humans thrive and what makes them happy. The most recent custodians of the project Robert Waldinger and Marc Schulz have found one simple finding that stands out.
40% of the variation in happiness can be explained by environmental factors. The quality and quantity of human connection is what makes the biggest impact. The authors words “Good relationships keep us happier, healthier and help us live longer. This true across lifespan and across cultures”
Happiness is not about we have materially it is what we surround ourself with in terms of connections.
If you were to be given a prescription for happiness it may well read as follows:-
- See the best in your partner
- Increase your interactions with your friends
- Increase interactions with work collegues
- Make a connection with the person who sells you a coffee or sandwich
- Be conscious about what is interesting about everyone
Being there physically is easy, being there mentally and emotionally for any interaction is an investment. If you do engage your whole self the return on that investment is invaluable. We really need to notice people, reading their verbal and non verbal behaviour, and noticing changes in behaviour that maybe the clue to a change of heart.
The study still continues today and the big question is social media an asset or a disaster? The Harvard study shows that it widens your social circle and makes maintaining contact with friends easier. However it means we are less attentive to the people who are physically present. So we have increased quantity of connection but at expense of the quality.
Try this week to really notice people in shops and restaurants who serve you. Be there for your partner properly not the usual meal on your lap in front of the TV. If a friends texts you this week, surprise them and just pick up the phone. Suggest to a colleague that you have the meeting face to face or even better go for a coffee with them.
This blog was based on an article in the Times by Daniel Finkelstein https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/the-secret-to-happiness-is-human-connection-not-economic-growth-7sgjp5n6v
To book a workshop on human connection please email bev@nuggetsoflearning.co.uk
